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January 22, 2010 / RA

The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin

HappinessProject The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin, is a memoir chronicling her year-long quest in the pursuit of happiness. At the beginning of the book, she describes the start of her project:

… as I sat on that crowded bus, I grasped two things: I wasn’t as happy as I could be, and my life wasn’t going to change unless I made it change. In that single moment, with that realization, I decided to dedicate a year to trying to be happier.

First, Rubin had to figure out if she believed she could change her level of happiness, and if so, what that would even look like. She explained her reasoning in the “Getting Started” section, and I found her research fascinating. I can’t imagine how much she must have read to come to the conclusion that, yes, she could affect her personal level of happiness, which she loosely defined as “positive affect,” “subjective well-being,” and “I’ll know it when I see it.”

As an attorney-turned-writer, Rubin tackled the year in a manner I very much admired. For each month, she focused on a specific area of her life to improve (energy, marriage, parenting, gratitude), which entailed a handful of pertinent resolutions.  For example, one of her goals for March, the Work month, was to launch a blog, which is still alive and well. Every night, Rubin evaluated her performance on a Resolution Chart, which helped her summarize her progress at the end of each month and chapter.

When I was reading this book and I described the premise to someone, the response was usually, “Oh, like Eat Pray Love?” Well, yes. And no. Yes, because both books cover life changes over the course of a year. But, no, vehemently no, because The Happiness Project is completely mundane, but that’s what makes it so personable. Rubin never left her New York apartment. She wasn’t financed by a book deal. Her venture wasn’t spurred by trauma. As she put it, she wanted to change her life without changing her life. For me, reading Eat Pray Love was like listening to an invited speaker in college as an act of escapism, but The Happiness Project was like chatting with your girlfriend at a sidewalk bistro. In some ways, that’s what makes its content a lot more thought-provoking, because if you’re anything like me, you start thinking, Hm, maybe I could do this.

Of course, it helped that I identified strongly with Rubin, who described herself as someone who always wants that gold star. Her methodology resonated with me, even when it highlighted areas of weakness. That said, I can understand if it comes off as somewhat militant and rigid. As Rubin emphasizes, everyone’s happiness project will look different because different things make different people happy. So, if a chart isn’t your deal, that’s okay.

I didn’t love everything about this book; I was turned off just slightly by the mantra-esque aspects, like the principles that eventually become The Four Splendid Truths and Rubin’s personal Twelve Commandments. There are sections that quote comments from her blog, and although the sentiments were relevant, they disrupted the first-person narrative in my brain.

I thought The Happiness Project was wonderfully researched, accessible, and (dare I say it?) inspirational. Most of all, it was thought-provoking. I’m still thinking about how I affect my own level of happiness, and how, by striving to become a happier, lighter person, I might impact more than my immediate person. I am for darn sure keeping my copy for future reference and another read-through.

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I received this book as a free sample from HarperCollins. If you’d like a chance to win your own copy and you live in the United States or Canada (sorry, other countries!), please leave a comment! Comments will close at 8pm Eastern Time on Sunday, January 24, and I will choose one winner randomly. Good luck!

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Edited to add: The comments are now closed, and the winner has been selected. Congratulations to Tammy O!

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20 Comments

  1. K / Jan 22 2010 12:27 pm

    I’ll take a chance. The book sounds interesting to me.

  2. Lady Susan / Jan 22 2010 12:31 pm

    Hmmm. Sounds interesting. I would like to check it out.

  3. mari / Jan 22 2010 12:37 pm

    I think I must be the target reader for this book because I have seen ads/advertorials for this in almost every magazine I read and now they’re taking over the blog world too. Great marketing campaign, and who can’t use a little more happiness? Although even reading the women’s mag condensed versions and your summary, I’m still not sure I’m ready to actively undertake a life-changing, deliberate plan of action. But contests get me every time, so consider me entered.

  4. Shannon / Jan 22 2010 12:45 pm

    I follow Gretchen on Twitter and she is very inspirational! Her book sounds great!

  5. Meredith / Jan 22 2010 12:58 pm

    As someone who definitely thought “sounds like Eat, Pray, Love” as I read the first paragraph of this post, I loved the rest of your review, and am intrigued. I’ve been on a fiction kick lately, but this is going on my list once I’m in a non-fiction/memoir mood again! Maybe sooner if I win that copy from you :-)

    I just left an annoyingly long comment yesterday, so I’ll try to keep this one a little shorter (but I make no promises!):

    I appreciated that you addressed the surface similarity to Eat, Pray, Love, a book that I really didn’t much care for (only read it for a book group I’m in), so I would be very interested to hear more of your views on that book.

    My main problem with it, and it sounds like you may agree with this, was how self-indulgent it felt, and totally not applicable to my life (or anyone else’s). She paid some lip service, but it didn’t feel genuine to me, about how she was lucky to have the ability to do something like this based on having a book deal. I just felt like she thought she somehow deserved to be sent on a trip around the world to deal with her depression and personal issues, and didn’t address the fact that only rich but depressed debutants had much hope of identifying with her experience. It really annoyed me, and I found her voice to be mostly whiny (especially in the second place with the meditating) and (I can think of no better phrase to describe it so I’m repeating) self-indulgent. I think it is possible to frame a trip like this in a way that I would have really liked the book, and I’m not sure what that would have looked like (possibly much like the pre-conceived script from yesterday’s post), but she definitely didn’t do it.

    For some reason I still find myself curious to read Committed, her new book about marrying the guy she met on the third leg of her journey. If I ever do read it, I will try to not go into it expecting it to be written in the same pity-me, self-riteous tone as Eat, Pray, Love or else I’ll probably read that tone into it even if it’s not actually there. Please do post a review if you happen to read it!

  6. Jane / Jan 22 2010 1:03 pm

    Sounds interesting… love a copy, so I don’t have to worry about getting it back to the library in time! :)

  7. Lisa / Jan 22 2010 1:48 pm

    Hi!

    I stumbled onto your blog a month or two back and since then have read a bunch of back entries, so I figured now would be as good a time as any to de-lurk! I don’t have a blog of my own, so I generally don’t leave comments on many blogs, but it’s so cool to read about the adventures of someone else like myself who enjoys spreadsheets and organization :)

    This book sounds very inspirational and I would be interested to see if some of the author’s realizations about happiness would help me find my own. I’d love the chance to read it.

    ~Lisa

  8. Azure / Jan 22 2010 1:49 pm

    The book does sound good! I wish I’d win. I never win at this kind of thing. :(

    BTW, I started reading Eat, Pray, Love last night and so far I’m liking it.

  9. Hilary / Jan 22 2010 2:29 pm

    This is one my ever growing list of books to read! And I am so jealous that you got hooked up to be a book reviewer! Awesome! Any YA book situation that you need help with (or want to pass along…)

  10. Kyleen / Jan 22 2010 2:34 pm

    Alrighty – I’m delurking! I’ve been reading your bolg for about three months now! It’s worth a shot!

  11. The Naked Redhead / Jan 22 2010 2:48 pm

    Ha…her two realizations at the beginning of the book sound a lot like some I’ve had. C’mon, Random Picking Gods! :)

  12. Kimberly / Jan 22 2010 3:26 pm

    at first i thought it sounded too much like eat pray love (which i really didn’t like). but you’ve convinced me that it might be worth a read…

  13. tammyo / Jan 22 2010 3:59 pm

    i’m curious…i’d like to hear what she has to say, if anything, about being content v. being happy.

  14. Heidi / Jan 22 2010 5:11 pm

    o.O I’m curious! The book is on my amazon wishlist, i’ve been reading her blog off and on for a year now, but i do love the concept of it all, so i’m excited to check it out! :)

  15. NGS / Jan 22 2010 6:04 pm

    I won the coupon for the Gap jeans here, but lightning could strike twice and I could win a book, too, right? Or would that make me a giveaway hog? I guess I’m okay with being a giveaway hog if that means I get a book.

  16. Anna / Jan 22 2010 6:43 pm

    I’ve been following the Happiness Project blog and really liked the book for the reasons you described. I’m totally motivated by gold stars too and I liked the way she she attacked the project and researched it so thoroughly!

  17. Janssen / Jan 22 2010 9:42 pm

    Oh, it sounds so good. I’ll read this even if I don’t win :)

  18. kater / Jan 23 2010 10:30 am

    almost bought this in the bookstore the other day. maybe it will be mine afterall!

  19. Liz / Jan 23 2010 10:29 pm

    So, I added this book to my Goodreads list as soon as I saw your mini review on there. This sounds like something that I would definitely like to read and get inspiration and motivation to make some changes in my own life. Thanks for introducing this read to me RaRa!

  20. Maria / Jan 24 2010 4:13 pm

    I read Gretchen’s blog daily. It is definitely full of useful ideas for increasing happiness in your life. I would love to have a copy of her book. Thank you.

    PS. RA your reviews are really informative, honest and I value your word.

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